Faithful Wounding

"Everything in life is designed to wound me with the realization of the world's insufficiency, until I become so detached that I will be able to find God alone in everything. Only then can all things bring me joy."

--Thomas Merton

I've been reading John Wesley's Sermon "On Christian Perfection." All I can say is "ugh." It shines as a clear and strong light exposing my shortcomings. So, today, again I pick up my cross, and bear it a little further, and realize that this whole disciple thing is hard.

NEXT!

Next!

I don't like moving, because with moving comes baggage. I moved to Arkansas in December, and I love it here. I have an awesome church where I work in my dream job. Two weeks ago my Fiance' moved just down the road. And everything looks wonderful! Except...

I still have not found my "group." I have not found the people with which I can just "chill." I do not have the list of phone numbers in my cell that I can dial up and ask "want to catch a movie?" I know these things take time, but the last time I moved it only took a couple of months. Now, I've been here six months and I have to ask myself if I have even been trying to find them.

Honestly, I haven't.

How often though, do we all do this? We favor busyness over relationship, tasks over connection, and clear cut goals over messy friendship. We do this with God too. "Give me a clear cut bible-study, being still 'creeps me out.'" Sure maybe you haven't said it out loud, but we've all thought it. Spiritually we favor the sterile environment of a clinic to the mud of a garden. But the garden is where growth, health and vitality dwell.

Lord, help me get my fingers dirty in the soil of relationships! Both with you, and with those around me. Put people in my path, and me in theirs. Open my eyes to see those that you have placed around me. Help me to cultivate that which you desire for me! In the name of Jesus. Amen.